About Dana Cole

Dana Cole has been a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist since 1977.

Are you currently in a relationship that is in trouble? Are you wondering what happened to the person you fell in love with? Wouldn’t you like to rediscover the relationship you once had and make it last forever? If you are single, understanding why past relationships didn’t work and learning to create satisfying and fulfilling relationships in the future is probably at the top of your list.

Romantic Love is the way our unconscious seeks to restore the feeling of joyful aliveness we felt as children. In pursuit of this goal, we unknowingly seek relationships with people who emotionally resemble our primary caregiver in both positive and negative ways - we call this finding our Imago match. It’s the negative qualities that interfere in our relationships.

When we remain unaware of the hidden agenda of romantic love, we keep on making the same mistakes. We need to understand conflict is growth trying to happen. By resolving our problems through Imago Dialogue, the emotional bond initially created by romantic love can evolve into the powerful bond that is real love.*

For over 15 years now I have been teaching couples how to create the safety and understanding each of us craves. I guide couples to see each other with compassionate curiosity, skills that are simple but counterintuitive. I have been working with couples using a theory and practice called Imago Therapy. This is based on the best selling book called "Getting the Love You Want" by Harville Hendrix, with whom I personally trained. I also work with gay and lesbian couples, and know that this work applies to all couples, all people.

Among other trainings, my work has been enhanced with a year-long course in Sensorimotor Psychotherapy, a somatic approach to working with trauma. Sometimes feelings can become overwhelming; Sensorimotor techniques help titrate the amount of feeling you want to feel at a given time leaving all of you, not just your feelings, in charge.

It is almost impossible to work with couples when one partner is "flooded" (only feelings, not able to access thoughts) due to past trauma. I have the necessary tools to work with the trauma, thus allowing the couple to work it out with each other, or clearing the way for a relationship to happen.

For more information, find me on Psychology Today’s or WebMD’s lists of recommended therapists. For more information about Imago Therapy go to ImagoTherapy.com.

* From the Imago Brochure, which I would be happy to send you, snail mail.