Imago Relationship Therapy
Imago Relationship Therapy integrates the seminal interpersonal insights of major Western psychological systems, behavioral sciences, and spiritual disciplines into a uniquely comprehensive theory of primary love relationships. Developed by Harville Hendrix, Ph.D., from the exclusive study of couples, it presents an approach that builds on and extends previous efforts.
The "Imago" is a composite image in the unconscious of the significant character traits and behaviors of childhood primary caretakers. By pairing us with an "Imago match" - an individual who is like our caretakers in emotionally significant ways - our unconscious drives us to re-create our childhood psychological dynamics in an attempt to heal the central wounds we carry. The process of Imago Relationship Therapy is aimed at using this context to transform relationships into a therapeutic encounter and fuel for each partner's psychological and spiritual self-completion.
Imago Relationship Therapy utilizes a variety of clinical procedures to teach couples, and singles desiring an intimate union, to identify their defenses against intimacy and to understand the unconscious forces that influence partner selection and contribute to difficulty in relationships. Goals of the therapy include: identifying frustrations rooted in primitive and illusory ideation of one's love partner; recognizing the failure of archaic behavior to gratify needs and achieve self-completion; and perceiving one's partner realistically without the encumbrance of one's own unconscious projections.
Other aspects of the Imago process involve learning new skills and changing hurtful behavior, in the course of which partners consciously aim to meet one another's needs and thereby restore the lost and denied parts of themselves. A core skill is a three-part dialogue that breaks couples out of defensive and symbiotic relating and promotes differentiation and compassion for the other. Therapy is ultimately made obsolete as each partner becomes a skilled advocate and "container" for the other's growth process. The Imago process, when consistently applied in any relationship, has the potential to be a transformative journey toward mutual healing and maturation.
Dana Cole, MFT - 510-653-8726 |