Recommended Reading

This is my bibliography of parenting and related books. Please feel free to contact me with any additions or comments

Dana Cole, MFT - 510-653-8726

1. Ames, Louise Bates.Your Ten -to Fourteen- Year Old. Dell, 1988. Ilg and Ames are part of the Gesell Institute, without which no parenting book list would be complete - specific information. all the Ilg and Ames series is excellent and a primary source

2. Armstrong, Thomas. In Their Own Way. Tarcher St. Martin's Press, 1987. the seven learning styles and how to teach anything seven ways

3.* Apter, .Altered Loves. Ballentine Books, 1990. the mother-daughter relationship explained from the relational point of view. adolescence is not a breaking away, it is a renegotiation

4. Beck, Charlotte. Everyday Zen. HarperSanFrancisco. 1989. "the best zen book out there" told to me by a trusted zen student, and reader. very easy to understand and use

5. Bluestein, Jane and Lynn Collins. Parents in a Pressure Cooker. Rosemont, NJ: Modern Learning Press, 1989. great teen book

6. Bradshaw, John. The Family. Deerfield Beach, Florida: Health Communications, Inc., 1988. alcoholic family dynamics explained well, a classic

7.* Bryson, Bill. A Walk in the Woods. "choke on your coffee funny" - Washington Post. Humor is healing, read this book

8. Caron, Ann F. Don't Stop Loving Me. HarperPerennial, 1991. "a reassuring guide for mothers of adolescent daughters", easy to read, practical

9.* Chodron, Pema. When Things Fall Apart: Heart Advice for Difficult Times. 1997. brava! well said. her message really resonates with me. articulates the unsayable.

10. Covey, Stephen. The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People. Simon and Schuster, 1989. I love books like this!

11. Cowan, Carolyn and Cowan, Philip. When Partners Become Parents. 1992. a study of what happens

12. Craig, Judi, Ph.D. "You're Grounded Till You're Thirty!" good, practical rules for teens. useful for establishing missing structure

13.* Crary, Elizabeth. Without Spanking or Spoiling. Parenting Press, 1979. one of the best early developmental books (0-5)

14.* Dinkmeyer, Don and G. McKay. The Parent's Handbook. (STEP) Circle Pines, MN: American Guidance Service, 1989. the text from the S.T.E.P. program

15. Dodson, Fitzhugh. How to Discipline With Love. New York: Signet, 1978. a behavioral approach that works! extreme stuff - worth reading - good to know when establishing boundaries for young children

16. Dodson, Shirleen. The Mother - Daughter Book Club. HarperPerennial. 1997. a book on forming a book group for needed connection, but also a great number of lists of good books for girls

17. Dreikurs, Rudolph and V. Soltz. Children the Challenge. New York: Hawthorn Books, Inc., 1964. a classic - the grandfather of positive parenting, but Nelson and STEP make it more practical

18.* Eagle, Carol, Dr. and Coleman, Carol. All That She Can Be. Simon and Schuster, 1993. "a hands-on, user friendly guide to being an empathic and effective parent to an adolescent daughter". this book was recommended to me as a sequel to Reviving Ophelia, and was very very highly recommended

19.* Elium, Don and Jeanne. Raising a Son. both these books were mentioned when I asked what books did I leave off this list?

20. Elium, Don and Jeanne. Raising a Daughter.

21.** Faber, Adele and E. Maslish. How to Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk. New York: Avon Books, 1989. GREAT! very readable. especially for older kids

22.** Faber, Adele and E. Maslish. Siblings Without Rivalry. New York: Avon Books, 1987. GREAT! the best book on siblings

23. Faber, Adele and E. Maslish. Liberated Parents, Liberated Children. Avon Books, New York, 1974. GREAT! the same authors. easy to read and really use

24. Fowler, Mary. Maybe You Know My Kid. Carol Publishing Group - A Birch Lane Press Book, 1993. very compelling. written by a mother whose child has Attention Deficit Disorder. informative about all issues associated with ADD

25.* Glen, H. Stephen and J. Nelsen. Raising Self-Reliant Children in a Self-Indulgent World. Rocklin, CA: Prima Publishing, 1987. the seven success indicators. very interesting and to the point

26. Golomb, Elan. Trapped in the Mirror: Adult Children of Narcissists in Their Struggle for Self. 1995. some parents are unable to give, understanding of this is essential if your parent was like this

27. Gottman, John. The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work.1999. a practical guide from the foremost relationship researcher

28. Greene, Lawrence. Learning Disabilities and Your Child. Fawcett Columbine, 1983. a must for parents of a learning disabled child. very practical and helpful

29**Hendrix, Harville. Getting the Love You Want. Harper Perennial, 1988. brilliant book on relationships. why we pick who we do. how to escape the power struggle. a GREAT book

30.* Hendrix, Harville. Keeping the Love You Find, A Guide for Singles. Harper Perennial, 1991. his follow-up book with a better look at his theory, and practical advice for those looking for the right relationship. also great

31.* Hendrix, Harville. Giving the Love that Heals, A Guide for Parents. Pocket Books, 1997. Harville's long awaited parenting book - "helping parents nurture their own development as they encourage emotional wholeness in their children"

32. Kelly, Kate. Complete Idiot's Guide to Parenting a Teenager. Alpha Books, 1996. the resource guide in the back is the best thing about this book

33. Kelly, Kate and P. Ramundo.You Mean I'm Not Lazy, Stupid or Crazy?! Tyrel l and Jerem Press, Cincinnati, 1993. 1-800-622-6611. written for adults who think they might have Attention Deficit Disorder

34. Keshet, Jamie K. Love and Power in the Stepfamily, A Practical Guide. McGraw Hill, 1987. a very highly recommended book on this subject, from a trusted source

35. Kurcinka, Mary Sheedy. Raising Your Spirited Child. New York:HarperCollins, 1991. highly recommended to me by several sources. on my stack to read

36. Lickona, Thomas. Raising Good Children. Bantam, 1985. how children develop morally. current book on moral development as originally developed by Kohlburg

37.* Luquet, Wade. Short Term Couples Therapy. a therapist's tool, it contains much of what you would consult an Imago therapist to learn

38. Marone, . How to Father a Successful Daughter. recommended, and noted that it wasn't on the list!

39. McMahon, Tom. Teen Tips. New York: Pocket Books, 1996. a compilation of tips from parents. good tips, good bibliography

40. Marston, Stephanie. The Magic of Encouragement. Morrow, 1990. one of the best on self-esteem

41. McBride, Angela Barron. How to Enjoy a Good Life With Your Teenager. Fisher Books. P.O. Box 38040 Tucson, AZ 85740-8040. (602) 292-9080. 1987. the title says it all - well written

42.* Miller, Alice. The Drama of the Gifted Child: The Search for The True Self. 1996. not to be missed for her clarity of vision. all of her books are great - a little academic, but worth it

44. Myss, Carolyn. Anantomy of the Spirit. talk about big picture - this is mesmorizing

45** Nelsen, Jane. Positive Discipline. New York: Ballantine Books, 1987. GREAT! she does Dreikurs much better than Dreikurs does!

46.* Peck, M. Scott. The Road Less Traveled. New York: Simon and Schuster, 1978. one of my and the world's all time favorites. religion made understandable! a GREAT book

47.* Pipher,Mary. Reviving Ophelia. Saving the Lives of Adolescent Girls. Ballentine, 1994. "an eye opening look at the dangers of being young and female"

48. Pipher, Mary. In the Shelter of Each Other. her follow-up book about what to do about helping adolescent girls

49.* Pittman, Frank. Grow Up!: How Taking Responsibility Can Make You a Happy Adult. 1998. recommended by a trusted source, Diane Sollee, orinator of smart marriages.com which is a huge central resource for all things marriage. do check this resource!

50.* Real, Terrance. I Don't Want to Talk About It: Overcoming the Legacy of Male Depression. a very revered book on a little known subject. depression doesn't look the same in men

51. Remen, Rachael. Kitchen Table Wisdom. Riverhead Books. 1996. such a well-written, easy to follow book by such a wise woman

52. Ricci, Isolina. Mom's House, Dad's House, Making Shared Custody Work. New York: MacMillian, 1980. a very good book on how parents can make two homes for their children after divorce and develop a business-like co-parenting relationship

53. Riera, Michael, Ph.D. Uncommon Sense for Parents with Teenagers. Berkeley: Celestial Arts, 1995. one of the recommended books on my pile to read!

54. Rimm, Sylvia. See Jane Win: The Rimm Report on How 1000 Girls Became Successful Women. 1999. very enlightening and assuring

55. Rutter, Virginia Beane. Celebrating Girls. a local author talks about how we help our adolescent girls remain whole. a sequel to Reviving Ophelia

56.* Schwartz, Tony. What Really Matters.. Bantam, 1995. an extremely readable history and update of human consciousness, for me many fragments were put together in this book. one of my all time favorites

57.* Steinem, Gloria. Revolution From Within: A Book of Self-Esteem. Little, Brown, and Company, 1992. a must read for parents of girls! a GREAT book

58. Turichi, Stanley. The Difficult Child. I took this off my list, favoring #28, and was told this book was very useful and helpful with this difficult subject and needed to be on here

59. Wallerstein, Judith & Blakeslee, Sandra. Second Chances, Men, Women and Children a Decade After Divorce. New York: Ticknor & Fields. (1989). it is not the divorce but the level of conflict. important information for those divorcing

60.* Welwood, John. Journey of the Heart. this book is so clear, and has such an important "first things first message" about being in a relationship. very very highly recommended

61.* Wolf, Anthony. Get Out of My Life, But First Could You Drive Me and Cheryl to the Mall? The Noonday Press, 1991. GREAT! informative, easy to read, humorous, about what teenagers need to do developmentally

62. Wolf, Anthony. It's not fair, Jeremy Sprenger's parents let him stay up all night! The Noonday Press, 1995.

Dana Cole, MFT - 510-653-8726